http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/
FOR TODAY (December 29, 2008)...
Outside my window... Let's see... I'm at my mom's house in Ohio... will have to look. It's sunny and windy. There's a patio chair that was overturned by the wind, leaves everywhere and the old faithful blue truck sitting in the driveway.
I am thinking... about how many people in my life got horribly sick with the stomach flu this past week. Really makes Christmas an adventure.
I am thankful for... the fact that, even though sickness sort of overtook us this season, it's nothing compared to cancer..... or starvation.... the loss of a loved one.
From the kitchen... my mother made me a lovely turkey sandwich for breakfast, like only she can do. :o)
I am wearing... jeans, black striped shirt over a black t-shirt and vacation hair.
I am going... to play the Wii with my mom, my brother and his fam.
I am reading... nothing. I'm on vacation.
I am hoping... to get home without any more major catastrophes.
I am hearing... my nephew talking to my mom about Alice in Wonderland.
Around the house... I'm not at my house, but around this house, signs on Christmas are starting to disappear.
One of my favorite things... spending time with my mom, and my brother and family.
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Hang out for a couple more days, then try to make it home.
Here is picture thought I am sharing...
I don't have a picture thought today, because I'm not near my own computer. However, if you can picture 9 cases of stomach flu in 5 days, bad weather, canceled trains, dead car AND truck batteries, keys locked in running cars...... you'll know some of what an adventure the last week has been. And I'm still smiling. I'm pretty sure it's only because I've lost my mind. :o)
Happy New Year!
December 29, 2008
December 22, 2008
SWD #11
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/FOR TODAY (December 22, 2008)...
Outside my window... It's -13 degrees with a windchill of -35. The snow is beautiful and crunchy, and my hair froze solid when I went outside.
I am thinking... about how I really don't want to be working this week.
I am thankful for... the fact that my mother arrived safely for Christmas. I'm also thankful for the wonderful time we're having together.
From the kitchen... The only thing I've had from my kitchen in the last five days is a glass of milk.
I am wearing... navy turtleneck, black sweater, navy pants, black shoes.....
I am creating... bulletins bulletins bulletins bulletins bulletins. Oh yeah, and bulletins.
I am going... to remember to warm the truck up so I don't have to sit in it and shiver.
I am reading... a lot of emails. I'm behind. Shock. Gasp. Faint.
I am hoping... to make these next few days the best ever.
I am hearing... my bed calling me. Come hooooooome..... cooooooome hooooooooome.....
Around the house... since I haven't been around much, my cat is now requiring me to show my ID at the door so he can make sure it's me entering.
One of my favorite things... Kids. Kids are so amazing... they can do ANYTHING. While most of the time, we think we should be the ones teaching, often we should be watching them and learning!
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Bulletins.
Bulletins.
More bulletins.
Some bulletins.
Larger bulletins.
Shopping.
Games.
Christmas fun.
Travel to Ohio.
Here is picture thought I am sharing... we had white out conditions the other day, and I, again being the rule-following driver that I am, snapped a shot of the road I was traveling on to remember what it looked like. THEN... while my mom and I were shopping, Mother Nature painted a GREAT picture on my windshield. Add some eyes, a nose and mouth and VOILA!
December 15, 2008
SWD #10
FOR TODAY (December 15, 2008)...
Outside my window... It's -6 degrees with a windchill of -32. The sun dogs are HUGE and gorgeous.
I am thinking... about what a busy weekend it was with four shows and a Christmas program. Wow.
I am thankful for... the talents God has given me, and the ability to use them.
From the kitchen... let me put it this way.... I haven't been home in the evenings since last Monday. I'll just leave it at that.
I am wearing... black turtleneck sweater, tan pants, black shoes..... and BRIGHT red and silver jingle bell earrings.
I am creating... thoughts and lists to finishing my Christmas shopping.
I am going... to attempt to clean my house before my mother gets here on Friday.
I am reading... welllllll..... I actually moved a book from the shelf to the night stand. I read the title now and then when I have a minute.
I am hoping... to not run out of money before I finish shopping.
I am hearing... the heater running.
Around the house... I thought something was wrong with the PS2 memory card because it wouldn't save my Katamari game. Turns out I was just dumb (surprise, gasp, faint). My brother helped me learn the PROPER way to save a game and all is well. Now I don't have to keep starting over.
One of my favorite things... hearing lots and lots of people singing together. Last night I heard them singing Christmas carols. It was fab.
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Christmas shopping.
Outside my window... It's -6 degrees with a windchill of -32. The sun dogs are HUGE and gorgeous.
I am thinking... about what a busy weekend it was with four shows and a Christmas program. Wow.
I am thankful for... the talents God has given me, and the ability to use them.
From the kitchen... let me put it this way.... I haven't been home in the evenings since last Monday. I'll just leave it at that.
I am wearing... black turtleneck sweater, tan pants, black shoes..... and BRIGHT red and silver jingle bell earrings.
I am creating... thoughts and lists to finishing my Christmas shopping.
I am going... to attempt to clean my house before my mother gets here on Friday.
I am reading... welllllll..... I actually moved a book from the shelf to the night stand. I read the title now and then when I have a minute.
I am hoping... to not run out of money before I finish shopping.
I am hearing... the heater running.
Around the house... I thought something was wrong with the PS2 memory card because it wouldn't save my Katamari game. Turns out I was just dumb (surprise, gasp, faint). My brother helped me learn the PROPER way to save a game and all is well. Now I don't have to keep starting over.
One of my favorite things... hearing lots and lots of people singing together. Last night I heard them singing Christmas carols. It was fab.
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Christmas shopping.
Brush-up rehearsal.
Mom arrives.
Three more performances.
Crash and burn.
Here is picture thought I am sharing... what is it with cats and Sorry!? The grey cat is Allige. The orange cat is my friend's cat, Reilly. They both INSIST on being in the middle of everything. Weirdos.
Here is picture thought I am sharing... what is it with cats and Sorry!? The grey cat is Allige. The orange cat is my friend's cat, Reilly. They both INSIST on being in the middle of everything. Weirdos.
December 8, 2008
SWD #9
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/
FOR TODAY (December 8, 2008)...
Outside my window... It's 19 degrees and the clouds are preparing to dump a few inches of snow on us..... so they say. Well, the weather people say, that is, not the clouds. Clouds can't talk, you know. Or maybe they can talk and we just don't know their language. I don't speak cloud.
I am thinking... about what clouds might talk about. "Hey Whitey, did you see that dragon shape Bob made yesterday? He really has a gift for shapes. My specialty is hail."..............................
I am thankful for... everything.
From the kitchen... the dishes actually did start crawling out of the dishwasher. I had to call in the kitchen gnomes to assist.
I am wearing... navy blue pants, navy blue turtleneck, black sweater, black shoes. And yes, I CAN wear blue and black together if I want to!
I am creating... um.....chaos?
I am going... to be very frugal with time and money this week.
I am reading... schedules of the coming weeks' rehearsals and shows.
I am hoping... to keep track of everything, and not lose the joy of the season.
I am hearing... two people talking in the background. Bing Crosby singing Christmas songs. Sing it, Bing!
Around the house... let's see..... my cat still remembers me, even though I don't spend much time there right now.
One of my favorite things... Christmas trees. I LOVE Christmas trees.
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Rehearsal.
Rehearsal.
Rehearsal.
Rehearsal.
Church.
Concert.
Meeting.
Party.
Performance.
Performance.
Performance.
Performance.
Performance.
Oh yeah.... and maybe a light snack.
Here is picture thought I am sharing...It's not a picture, but it's a Garfield comic strip that made me laugh. (Copyright Jim Davis)
December 5, 2008
Until You've Had An Addiction...
I wonder how many times in my life I've said the words, "They got what they deserved" to people in conversations. I used to think it was a perfectly rational line of thought, as in, if you're going to dig your hole, don't be surprised when it caves in on top of you.
It's taken me a long time to realize what a nasty attitude that is about people and life in general. When I make a mistake, or royally mess something up, the last thing in the world I need is to be given the proverbial "you made your bed, now you have to lie in it" speech. Yet, how many times do we give that speech, either face to face, or worse, behind the scenes, without a clue of how hurtful it comes across to the defeated comrad?
I've prayed for God to give me more compassion over the years, and since watching people or animals suffer nearly sends me to the ground in agony, I'm calling Him Faithful on that one. In my search for a genuinely caring heart, I've discovered that addiction is one of the areas in which I've found a new interest.
For people who have never had an addiction, it's hard to understand why you can't "just quit" on the spot. Just make the decision to do it, right? Well, okay, but really, whether it's drugs, alcohol, television, computers, video games, sports, or any other thing we may latch on to, when it becomes and addiction, it takes over your life and leaves you with little self-discipline or control. That's WHY it's called addiction.
I highly doubt that anyone wakes up one morning and says, "Hmm... I think I'll see what I can get addicted to today." It just happens. We make decisions, yes, and we're accountable, yes, but we're also human. I know that, for me personally, if I could ever go a day without messing SOMETHING up, or making a wrong decision, I would probably wonder if I was having an out-of-body experience. This begs the question....
Why do we feel we have the RIGHT to judge or draw the line on what is an acceptable mistake and what's past the point of no return? Which mess-up deserves grace and mercy, and which deserves condemnation and finger-pointing shame?
I'm not negating the importance of consequences here, because unfortunately, consequences are sometimes the best teachers, but don't you think a "compassionate" God would want us to extend the hand of mercy, even in the worst of circumstances? If God is truly who He says He is, then He loves us NO MATTER WHAT, and when we get into trouble, or make a bad decision, He doesn't point the almighty finger at us and furrow His brow with rejection and anger. Rather, His unconditional love for us has Him extending both arms, pulling us close to his heart and walking us through our circumstances gently.
I suppose it should be no different for us in the way we treat people, especially those with addictions. We should be gentle, patient.....merciful..... even in the face of an addict who has "made their bed" and is now lying in it. Addiction destroys reason, obliterates rationality, sometimes even steals your sanity.
Compassion revives - WE could be the misty horizon of hope for someone struggling with addiction in a particular area, but we can't do it by sticking our self-righteous fingers in their face. Too harsh? Maybe, but isn't there a simple truth to all of this? If WE want to be given the second, third, tenth, hundredth chances when we mess things up, then I think we should probably start giving the same grace to others.
Or, perhaps once again, I am just another babbling blogger........
It's taken me a long time to realize what a nasty attitude that is about people and life in general. When I make a mistake, or royally mess something up, the last thing in the world I need is to be given the proverbial "you made your bed, now you have to lie in it" speech. Yet, how many times do we give that speech, either face to face, or worse, behind the scenes, without a clue of how hurtful it comes across to the defeated comrad?
I've prayed for God to give me more compassion over the years, and since watching people or animals suffer nearly sends me to the ground in agony, I'm calling Him Faithful on that one. In my search for a genuinely caring heart, I've discovered that addiction is one of the areas in which I've found a new interest.
For people who have never had an addiction, it's hard to understand why you can't "just quit" on the spot. Just make the decision to do it, right? Well, okay, but really, whether it's drugs, alcohol, television, computers, video games, sports, or any other thing we may latch on to, when it becomes and addiction, it takes over your life and leaves you with little self-discipline or control. That's WHY it's called addiction.
I highly doubt that anyone wakes up one morning and says, "Hmm... I think I'll see what I can get addicted to today." It just happens. We make decisions, yes, and we're accountable, yes, but we're also human. I know that, for me personally, if I could ever go a day without messing SOMETHING up, or making a wrong decision, I would probably wonder if I was having an out-of-body experience. This begs the question....
Why do we feel we have the RIGHT to judge or draw the line on what is an acceptable mistake and what's past the point of no return? Which mess-up deserves grace and mercy, and which deserves condemnation and finger-pointing shame?
I'm not negating the importance of consequences here, because unfortunately, consequences are sometimes the best teachers, but don't you think a "compassionate" God would want us to extend the hand of mercy, even in the worst of circumstances? If God is truly who He says He is, then He loves us NO MATTER WHAT, and when we get into trouble, or make a bad decision, He doesn't point the almighty finger at us and furrow His brow with rejection and anger. Rather, His unconditional love for us has Him extending both arms, pulling us close to his heart and walking us through our circumstances gently.
I suppose it should be no different for us in the way we treat people, especially those with addictions. We should be gentle, patient.....merciful..... even in the face of an addict who has "made their bed" and is now lying in it. Addiction destroys reason, obliterates rationality, sometimes even steals your sanity.
Compassion revives - WE could be the misty horizon of hope for someone struggling with addiction in a particular area, but we can't do it by sticking our self-righteous fingers in their face. Too harsh? Maybe, but isn't there a simple truth to all of this? If WE want to be given the second, third, tenth, hundredth chances when we mess things up, then I think we should probably start giving the same grace to others.
Or, perhaps once again, I am just another babbling blogger........
Useless Trivia....
If anyone can answer all of these questions about me correctly, I'll take them out for a lovely frothy beverage! I'll give you a hint..... you can cheat on some of these by looking at a previous post.
1. What's my favourite colour?
2. What are the two foods I absolutely cannot handle eating?
3. Name three words I don't like.
4. Name three words I DO like.
5. What's the first thing I do when I buy a new pair of shoes?
6. What's my cat's name?
7. Who was my best friend in high school?
8. Where does my mom live?
9. How many piercings and tattoos do I have?
10. Where did I go to college?
11. How many instruments do I play?
12. Name one of my favourite sayings.
13. How many siblings do I have?
14. What colour are my eyes?
15. Name three of my favourite smells.
16. What is my official title at work?
17. What kind of band do I play with?
18. To where have I always wanted to travel?
19. What are two of my biggest pet peeves?
20. What really hurts me?
21. How long have I lived in MN?
22. Name three jobs I've had in my life.
23. Do I like sweet or salty better?
24. Am I religious?
25. What kind of dancing do I just LOVE?
26. What makes me reeeeeeeeally happy?
27. How is my living room decorated?
28. Do I like sports?
29. If I were going to own a dog, what kind would I get?
30. One of my life's philosphies is......
1. What's my favourite colour?
2. What are the two foods I absolutely cannot handle eating?
3. Name three words I don't like.
4. Name three words I DO like.
5. What's the first thing I do when I buy a new pair of shoes?
6. What's my cat's name?
7. Who was my best friend in high school?
8. Where does my mom live?
9. How many piercings and tattoos do I have?
10. Where did I go to college?
11. How many instruments do I play?
12. Name one of my favourite sayings.
13. How many siblings do I have?
14. What colour are my eyes?
15. Name three of my favourite smells.
16. What is my official title at work?
17. What kind of band do I play with?
18. To where have I always wanted to travel?
19. What are two of my biggest pet peeves?
20. What really hurts me?
21. How long have I lived in MN?
22. Name three jobs I've had in my life.
23. Do I like sweet or salty better?
24. Am I religious?
25. What kind of dancing do I just LOVE?
26. What makes me reeeeeeeeally happy?
27. How is my living room decorated?
28. Do I like sports?
29. If I were going to own a dog, what kind would I get?
30. One of my life's philosphies is......
December 1, 2008
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/
FOR TODAY (December 1, 2008)...
Outside my window... A fresh blanket of snow is on the ground that's rapidly turning brown from the salting/sanding trucks.
I am thinking... about a question my friend asked me regarding whether or not I see myself as a "simple woman". The answer is, of course, not even close. Perhaps I should start The Unusual Weirdo's Daybook??
I am STILL thankful for... my health and everything I have.
From the kitchen... the dishes are going to start crawling out of the dishwasher themselves if I don't put them away soon.
I am wearing... black pants, forrest green turtleneck, Harley-Davidson shoes.
I am creating... a gift for someone. :o)
I am going... to the theatre after work to check in on things.
I am reading... nope.... no time to read right now.
I am hoping... to slow my mind's time down for the next month and just enjoy things.
I am hearing... nothing. It's silent. Wow.
Around the house... I have Christmas presents laying around waiting to be wrapped!
One of my favorite things... the holiday season. I wish it would linger on....
A few plans for the rest of the week: I haven't gotten that far yet.
Here is a picture thought I am sharing...
I took some really bad quality pictures of my friend's Christmas tree lights last night. They're pretty. So... yeah. Here they are.
FOR TODAY (December 1, 2008)...
Outside my window... A fresh blanket of snow is on the ground that's rapidly turning brown from the salting/sanding trucks.
I am thinking... about a question my friend asked me regarding whether or not I see myself as a "simple woman". The answer is, of course, not even close. Perhaps I should start The Unusual Weirdo's Daybook??
I am STILL thankful for... my health and everything I have.
From the kitchen... the dishes are going to start crawling out of the dishwasher themselves if I don't put them away soon.
I am wearing... black pants, forrest green turtleneck, Harley-Davidson shoes.
I am creating... a gift for someone. :o)
I am going... to the theatre after work to check in on things.
I am reading... nope.... no time to read right now.
I am hoping... to slow my mind's time down for the next month and just enjoy things.
I am hearing... nothing. It's silent. Wow.
Around the house... I have Christmas presents laying around waiting to be wrapped!
One of my favorite things... the holiday season. I wish it would linger on....
A few plans for the rest of the week: I haven't gotten that far yet.
Here is a picture thought I am sharing...
I took some really bad quality pictures of my friend's Christmas tree lights last night. They're pretty. So... yeah. Here they are.
November 24, 2008
SWD #8
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/
FOR TODAY (November 24, 2008)...
Outside my window... The trees have suddenly turned from their beautiful autumn colours to a bare brown stick look.
I am thinking... about my stepmother. Her birthday is tomorrow.
I am STILL thankful for... my health. So many people around me are sick and suffering.
From the kitchen... I'm looking forward to having one of Jonathan's chocolate truffle cookies. They are amazing.
I am wearing... white turtleneck, black sweater, black pants, black and white chunky shoes and penguin earrings.
I am creating... a list of potential purchases on Black Friday. Woo!!
I am going... to enjoy this coming weekend immensely.
I am reading...the newspaper from Saturday.
I am hoping... I do okay leading two parent meetings tonight and tomorrow night.
I am hearing... the steadiness of a ticking clock.
Around the house... I am enjoying having Christmas decorations for the first time in my adult life.
One of my favorite things... the smell of pine trees. There's just nothing like it.
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Two meetings, a girls' night, Thanksgiving day fun and 4:00AM Black Friday shopping!
Here is a picture thought I am sharing... My larger-than-life cat thinks he's a tiny baby, and must have four treats every night before bed. Lately, after the treat ritual, he's taken to pawing at my cheek and my covers until I let him in. He then curls up as close to me as possible (as in, if he were any closer, he'd be wearing my pajamas), puts his head on my pillow and falls asleep. I was able to snap a couple of not-so-good pictures with my phone the other night. Isn't he goofy? What a goob.
November 17, 2008
SWD #7
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/FOR TODAY (November 17, 2008)...
Outside my window... I am finally starting to see signs of winter. It's about time.
I am thinking... about how my motives have been judged by someone who ought to know better, and how badly that hurts.
I am thankful for... my health.
From the kitchen... I'm stuck on Cap'n Crunch Christmas Crunchberries. So nutritious.
I am wearing... black turtleneck, tan pants, black shoes. It was the first thing I saw in the closet this morning.
I am creating... a list of items to be covered in a meeting later today. Hope I have all my ducks in a row. What in the world does that mean, anyway.... to have all your ducks in a row? I've never seen anyone line up ducks.
I am going... to clean my kitchen tonight. I think.
I am reading...nope.... still no time to read, though I did read some of the newspaper last night.
I am hoping... my mother actually gets her late birthday present today.
I am hearing... extremely harsh words echoing in my head.
Around the house... I must empty the litter box, lest the beast begin to rebel.
One of my favorite things... Christmas movies.
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Helping my friend paint her bedroom.
Paying bills.
Other insignificant stuff.
Here is picture thought I am sharing... For Administrative Professionals Day this year, someone gave me a miniature rose bush. It blossomed well inside the office with little quarter-size mini roses. However, I soon discovered it had been taken over by gnats, so I set it outside the back door, thinking it would die. Well.... not only did it stay alive, but it decided to valiantly put out one last little blossom. It fought and fought and FINALLY opened up its petite petals. The next day it snowed and the little rose died. The end. *sigh*
November 10, 2008
SWD #6
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/
FOR TODAY (November 10, 2008)...
Outside my window... it's a balmy 25 degrees and the sun is shining.
I am thinking... about how I failed to get my mother's birthday present to her on time.
I am thankful for... her forgiveness.
From the kitchen... I made brownies last night, and they tasted like carboard. I'm thinking I won't buy that brand again. You'd think Ghirardelli would have been better.
I am wearing... black turtleneck, black and grey palazzo pants, black boots and a black beret.
I am creating... a sign-up sheet for volunteer opportunities.
I am going... to attempt to get my remote starter installed in my truck before winter gets here.
I am reading...nope.... still no time to read.
I am hoping... to force myself to go home tonight and just be there.
I am hearing... the heater running in the background, and the clock ticking. It's nice and quiet for the moment.
Around the house... I am going through old cassette tapes to see what I should keep and what I should throw away.
One of my favorite things... is cozying up at home with my lumberjack jammies on, the fireplace going, the lights on the trees (yes, I have many pine trees in my house) glowing softly, and cinnamon candles mixed with some balsam fir incense wafting through the rooms.
A few plans for the rest of the week:
Must make up Christmas lists and get them to my momala.
Must also get momala's birthday present to her.... late.... as usual. *sigh*
Here is picture thought I am sharing... I walked out of my friend's house last night and discovered my truck like this. I'm not exactly sure what I did to make the little birdies angry with me, but they have definitely made a statement. I stopped counting the poop splotches when I got to 75. (One wonders WHY I bothered counting them in the first place, right?) I've never seen anything like it. Too bad it wasn't the bluebird of happiness - today I'd be high on life. :o)
November 6, 2008
Living with Regret
This morning I was greeted by the maintenance man whose brother has been fighting a battle with cancer. It was a normal morning....
"Morning, Michele."
"Morning, Bill."
.....until......
"Well, things took a turn for the worse last night."
"Uh oh, that doesn't sound good."
..... Bill went on to tell me that his brother's cancer has spread to his bones and that there's nothing more they can do for him, so they're sending him home for hospice care.
Hospice care. A term I've become all too familiar with, as hospice was involved when Elmer passed away last year. You only get hospice care when you have "less than six months to live" according to the doctors.
I'm speechless, and immediately, my thoughts turn to something I wrote in a letter several years ago regarding living with regret. Perhaps living in the same city as the world renown Mayo Clinic I am exposed to more illness and suffering than someone living in podunk USA, but it seems like every time I turn around, I hear about someone dying. A mother, an uncle, a grandparent, a friend.... a child. I wonder, when I hear these stories, how many of those dealing with a the devastation of losing someone are also dealing with regret.
I should have said..... I shouldn't have done..... I could have.... I never did..... words you must live with for the rest of your own time on earth. Living with regret is a very difficult thing, as it's not something that really goes away. It's almost as if it develops a personality and sticks its ugly tongue out at you, because it knows that it's too late for you to do anything about the past.
When I think about Bill and his sweet brother, my heart weeps such bitter tears, as I know they don't have much time to do and say everything necessary to prevent having to live (or pass on) with regret looming over them. Why do we wait so long? Why does it take a crisis to get us to move?
My mother informed me last night that she told one of our relatives that I don't have time to talk on the phone anymore because I'm so busy. So I ask myself, "Self.... do you REALLY want to live with the regret of having not spent more time on the phone with your mom?" The answer is a definitive NO. I am planning on having my mother around for many, many years to come, but there really is no guarantee is there? If (and God, I would really appreciate not being tested in this area) something were to happen to her today or tomorrow, would I be satisfied and content that I did all I could to show her how much I love and value her?
It's simple. I must improve. Same with my dad, same with my brother, my grandmother, my friends. I must improve! I want them to know without a shadow of a doubt that I love them more than air. I must get back to taking advantage of every opportunity I am given to say, "I love you. You are valuable to me. I am glad you are in my life."
I encourage you as well, to find the time you need to say all you must say, and do all you must do to show people how much you love them. YOU are the one who has to live with regret. Do all you can to avoid it - even if it means stretching yourself beyond your emotional comfort zone, and for goodness sake, don't wait for the crisis to be your catapult!
With that, I remain.... I love you all. You are valuable to me, and I am glad you're in my life.
"Morning, Michele."
"Morning, Bill."
.....until......
"Well, things took a turn for the worse last night."
"Uh oh, that doesn't sound good."
..... Bill went on to tell me that his brother's cancer has spread to his bones and that there's nothing more they can do for him, so they're sending him home for hospice care.
Hospice care. A term I've become all too familiar with, as hospice was involved when Elmer passed away last year. You only get hospice care when you have "less than six months to live" according to the doctors.
I'm speechless, and immediately, my thoughts turn to something I wrote in a letter several years ago regarding living with regret. Perhaps living in the same city as the world renown Mayo Clinic I am exposed to more illness and suffering than someone living in podunk USA, but it seems like every time I turn around, I hear about someone dying. A mother, an uncle, a grandparent, a friend.... a child. I wonder, when I hear these stories, how many of those dealing with a the devastation of losing someone are also dealing with regret.
I should have said..... I shouldn't have done..... I could have.... I never did..... words you must live with for the rest of your own time on earth. Living with regret is a very difficult thing, as it's not something that really goes away. It's almost as if it develops a personality and sticks its ugly tongue out at you, because it knows that it's too late for you to do anything about the past.
When I think about Bill and his sweet brother, my heart weeps such bitter tears, as I know they don't have much time to do and say everything necessary to prevent having to live (or pass on) with regret looming over them. Why do we wait so long? Why does it take a crisis to get us to move?
My mother informed me last night that she told one of our relatives that I don't have time to talk on the phone anymore because I'm so busy. So I ask myself, "Self.... do you REALLY want to live with the regret of having not spent more time on the phone with your mom?" The answer is a definitive NO. I am planning on having my mother around for many, many years to come, but there really is no guarantee is there? If (and God, I would really appreciate not being tested in this area) something were to happen to her today or tomorrow, would I be satisfied and content that I did all I could to show her how much I love and value her?
It's simple. I must improve. Same with my dad, same with my brother, my grandmother, my friends. I must improve! I want them to know without a shadow of a doubt that I love them more than air. I must get back to taking advantage of every opportunity I am given to say, "I love you. You are valuable to me. I am glad you are in my life."
I encourage you as well, to find the time you need to say all you must say, and do all you must do to show people how much you love them. YOU are the one who has to live with regret. Do all you can to avoid it - even if it means stretching yourself beyond your emotional comfort zone, and for goodness sake, don't wait for the crisis to be your catapult!
With that, I remain.... I love you all. You are valuable to me, and I am glad you're in my life.
November 3, 2008
Why Are We Doing What We're Doing?
You know.... I am puzzled by something.... I am perplexed.... I am contemplating....
I was going through some different blog sites today. We are free to exercise our First Amendment rights.... say what you want.... believe what you want, and I do appreciate reading the thoughts of other people. Blogs are good for that sort of thing.
However, why is it that more often than not, I see people taking another person's opinion as Gospel truth? WHY are we not studying for ourselves? I may have commentaries about different subjects, but is my story something to base your beliefs on, or is someone else's story something I should base MY beliefs on? How do you know the "story" is true? How do you know it hasn't been altered? You find the source, that's how!
There's a game that nearly everyone I know has played at one time or another. It's called Telephone. One person whispers a sentence into another's ear, and it gets passed down the line until the last person almost always has a completely different version than what was originally said. Very rarely do the two versions match up, with the exception of maybe a couple of words.
While this is a game most often played in youth groups or classrooms, is it not the same in life? Stories get altered, so we must be careful what we base our "truth" on when passing along tales. Every story told, or thing relayed to be fact, is subject to opinion and perspective, as well as communication gaps. We must learn to go back to the original source from which it came to find the truth for ourselves.
Now, don't get me wrong here, I do not claim to be the perfect eternal student who spends hours and hours buried in books, but I at least give it a few counts before I buy into something. My eyes do a short bobble, and I am immediately on alert when the words, "Hey, did you know that...." come out of someone's mouth. I am working diligently to make sure I don't believe something just because someone, somewhere said it was true. Does that make me skeptical? Maybe, but I'd rather be skeptical and than mindless.
Unfortunately, my diatribe comes from my own experience in the Christian world. Yes, I am a believer in God, and the overwhelming love He has for everyone on this earth, but I am not a dogmatic believer in denominations, nor am I prone to fall for religious opinions without studying them first. I want to know WHY I'm doing what I'm doing, or what's the point of doing it at all?
I had a very interesting conversation with an eleven-year old last year that revolved around something her Sunday school teacher was attempting to indoctrinate into the kids in her class. The student was very indignant, and rightly so, I suppose. Her teacher was talking about the wrongness of people with a certain style of dress, specifically, the "goth" style. For the sake of time, we will take the term, "goth" to mean just that, a style, rather than what Gothic really means, though you may consider studying it for yourself, as it's very fascinating.
When confronted with this teacher's (good-hearted) intentions to convince her students that wearing skulls and having tattoos is wrong, and that people who wear them are bad, the youngster attempted to ask questions that would upset religious mindsets world wide. "Why do you say it is wrong? Aside from modesty, isn't God more interested in our hearts than what we wear?" And then came the real controversy, "Why are you saying that tattoos are wrong? My other teacher has tattoos and she's a good Christian who loves Jesus."
Oh boy.
Like so many other Christians do, Ms. Teacher simply opened up her Bible to Leviticus 19:28 and read, "Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the LORD." So, the story goes on and the young girl eventually ended up having an interesting discussion with her teacher, and later her parents and me.
The average person would take Ms. Teacher's quote of scripture, agree with it and pass it on as absolute truth. This is a problem. While I am not negating the truth of the Bible, I am rather disillusioned by the perspective and opinion of Ms. Teacher who has obviously not gone back to the origin, nor the context of said scripture to find its true meaning. She is believing something, but doesn't know why, or where it came from in the first place, and she's passing it along as fact.
I don't dare to venture down the path of theological debate, but seriously.... do we honestly think that there were people running around with inked-up needles, drawing hearts, roses and "I love Mom" on the various appendages of people in Old Testament times? Of course not. Read it - study it - find out for yourself what that scripture and context really mean. I bet you'll be surprised.
I heard a story (yes, a story) once, and I have no idea whether it's a true story or a creative illustration from someone's mind, but it has fantastic application to this post.
*************************************************************
There was a lady who was going to cook a ham one day. She took the ham out, cut the end of it off and put it in the pan. Her husband, curious enough to ask, quizzed her with, "Honey, why do you cut the end off of the ham?"
His wife simply stated, "I don't know, that was the way my mother always did it."
Dear hubby, still inquisitive, called the mother, and asked her, "My wife says you always cut the end off of a ham before you cook it, and I was just wondering why?"
The mother also stated, "I don't know, that was the way my mother always did it."
Still determined, he called Grandma. "Grandma, I've been told that you always cut the end off of a ham before you cook it, and I was just wondering, why?"
"Well," she replied, "I always had a small pan, and cutting the end off was the only way I could get it to fit."
*************************************************************
You may interpret this story however you wish, but the reality is, we must know why we are doing what we're doing, or there really is NO point in doing it! We should be ready to give an answer for what we believe in, and if we don't know the answer, we should not be mindless about it, but rather, challenge ourselves to study and find out what we truly believe and WHY we believe those things.
Of course, I could be just another babbling blogger with an opinion. *shrug*
SWD #5
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/FOR TODAY (November 3, 2008)...
Outside My Window... Mother Nature is exacting her wrath on me as it is STILL going to be above 70 degrees again!! Oy.
I am thinking... about how I did not enjoy my bagel with tomato this morning.
I am thankful for... my mother. She has such an amazing heart.
From the kitchen... my best friend says she stole my rice-a-roni. I think she's crazy.
I am wearing... black pants, a black shirt, black earrings and awesome black boots (they have AWESOME shoe noise).
I am creating... a list of things I have to get done this week.
I am going... to try to get my mom's birthday present to her on time this year.
I am reading... no... I am not reading. I haven't had time to read in the last week!
I am hoping... to not burn my tongue on this cup of coffee that is tempting me.
I am hearing... construction noise outside, and the voice in my head that is telling me it is okay to take a break and not get buried.
Around the house... I should probably tidy up a bit. Not being home makes for stuff dumped wherever it lands!
One of my favorite things... getting up early the day after Thanksgiving to go shopping with Tammy and Kristin. Only three and a half more weeks!
A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week:
Making contact with Words Players people, and getting all that stuff organized.
Um.... I don't know what else.... haven't written it all down yet!
Here is picture thought I am sharing... for the last six years, I have photographed my best friend's kids. This year, I'm doing a little experimenting with black and white, so here is one of the latest pictures of Caleb. He's such a handsome kid, and I love the contrast of his perfect skin with the black background.
October 30, 2008
Orange Pop and Toothbrush Soap #2
You may be wondering why I picked the title, Orange Pop and Toothbrush Soap. If you've read previous posts, then you know about the Toothbrush Soap. Today, I shall regale you with the Orange Pop story. Hopefully, it will bring a smile to your face.
You see, when my older brother and I were kids, he was my hero (he still is, for that matter), and I wanted to be juuuuuuust like him. I listened to the same music he did, tried to dress how he did, attempted to accomplish the same things he accomplished. Even into my college years, I acquired my FCC license and became a radio DJ, because my brother did it, and if my brother did it, that meant it was cool.
Before I get into the rest of the story, I'd like to give a shout out to all you little sisters out there, who have faithfully clung to the pant leg of your superhuman older brothers. You've been brushed off, pushed away, taken advantage of in so many ways, and yet, have remained the ever-loyal, bright-eyed followers. This tale is for you....
Our mother used to take us to McDonald's restaurant for lunch. I'm not trying to make myself sound old, but in those days, the Happy Meal was relatively new, and you thought you were something else if you actually got one.
My brother and I would eat our Happy Meals, and take our miniature orange pops, in the waxy cups (remember those?) home with us in the car. In the back seat, we would sit, not crossing the middle line onto the other sibling's space, and then it would start...
"Hey, Michele, I bet I can drink my coke (in the south, it's ALL coke) faster than you can drink yours."
"No you can't."
"Yes, I can. Wanna race to see who can drink theirs faster?"
"Okay."
"Ready....... set....... GO!!"
The sucking and slurping would begin, and I would pucker as fast I could, fighting brain-freeze and that feeling that your nose is going to fall off and your eyeballs pop out from the high amount of carbonation. I would watch him intensely to make sure I was winning even though he was sucking it down as fast as me.
"DONE!" I would shout, panting and puffing, eyes watery from the effort.
"Awww," he'd say, "I guess you won."
Can you hear the triumphant music playing loudly? As I would begin to catch my breath after the intense moments, the realization that I had won would set in and victory would display it's banner over me. Those of you who have older siblings know that actually beating them in ANYTHING can only be compared to such feats like stopping a train.... climbing Mt. Everest..... leaping tall buildings in a single bound. The sheer satisfaction is worth more than nearly anything else in the kingdom of childhood.
As I would bask in the glory of winning, and Mom would begin the journey home in our army green Gran Torino, my brother would look proudly over at me and the words would ooze out of his mouth, "Gosh.... I bet you're thirsty."
I would clutch my cup, holding nothing but ice, in my little hand and realize that yes, I was indeed thirsty. Then, gazing wantingly at my brother, his bigger-than-life sinister grin illuminating the air, I would notice his cup, and how.... how... it was.... full?? You mean, he FAKE raced me? I won, though!!! But.....but..... somehow, I lost? He tricked me into drinking all that I had while he only pretended? My naive young mind could not possibly wrap itself around this concept.
Nevermind the slimy sarcasm that dripped from his lips, let's talk about the manipulation. Let's talk about the evil trickery he used on me. My victory.... his defeat... *sigh*. It would all fade into the distance as we would finish the ride home, him with his slurping delight, and me with my melting ice and dashed hopes. Can you HEAR the violins playing?
I can't tell you how many times I fell for tricks like this. As I have said before, it is a wonder my brother and I survived growing up, let alone ended up as friends. To all of you who have fallen into the traps of your wise older siblings, I salute you. Thanks for taking one for the team!
To all of you older siblings, throw us a bone now and then, would ya? I love you Brada-mon!
You see, when my older brother and I were kids, he was my hero (he still is, for that matter), and I wanted to be juuuuuuust like him. I listened to the same music he did, tried to dress how he did, attempted to accomplish the same things he accomplished. Even into my college years, I acquired my FCC license and became a radio DJ, because my brother did it, and if my brother did it, that meant it was cool.
Before I get into the rest of the story, I'd like to give a shout out to all you little sisters out there, who have faithfully clung to the pant leg of your superhuman older brothers. You've been brushed off, pushed away, taken advantage of in so many ways, and yet, have remained the ever-loyal, bright-eyed followers. This tale is for you....
Our mother used to take us to McDonald's restaurant for lunch. I'm not trying to make myself sound old, but in those days, the Happy Meal was relatively new, and you thought you were something else if you actually got one.
My brother and I would eat our Happy Meals, and take our miniature orange pops, in the waxy cups (remember those?) home with us in the car. In the back seat, we would sit, not crossing the middle line onto the other sibling's space, and then it would start...
"Hey, Michele, I bet I can drink my coke (in the south, it's ALL coke) faster than you can drink yours."
"No you can't."
"Yes, I can. Wanna race to see who can drink theirs faster?"
"Okay."
"Ready....... set....... GO!!"
The sucking and slurping would begin, and I would pucker as fast I could, fighting brain-freeze and that feeling that your nose is going to fall off and your eyeballs pop out from the high amount of carbonation. I would watch him intensely to make sure I was winning even though he was sucking it down as fast as me.
"DONE!" I would shout, panting and puffing, eyes watery from the effort.
"Awww," he'd say, "I guess you won."
Can you hear the triumphant music playing loudly? As I would begin to catch my breath after the intense moments, the realization that I had won would set in and victory would display it's banner over me. Those of you who have older siblings know that actually beating them in ANYTHING can only be compared to such feats like stopping a train.... climbing Mt. Everest..... leaping tall buildings in a single bound. The sheer satisfaction is worth more than nearly anything else in the kingdom of childhood.
As I would bask in the glory of winning, and Mom would begin the journey home in our army green Gran Torino, my brother would look proudly over at me and the words would ooze out of his mouth, "Gosh.... I bet you're thirsty."
I would clutch my cup, holding nothing but ice, in my little hand and realize that yes, I was indeed thirsty. Then, gazing wantingly at my brother, his bigger-than-life sinister grin illuminating the air, I would notice his cup, and how.... how... it was.... full?? You mean, he FAKE raced me? I won, though!!! But.....but..... somehow, I lost? He tricked me into drinking all that I had while he only pretended? My naive young mind could not possibly wrap itself around this concept.
Nevermind the slimy sarcasm that dripped from his lips, let's talk about the manipulation. Let's talk about the evil trickery he used on me. My victory.... his defeat... *sigh*. It would all fade into the distance as we would finish the ride home, him with his slurping delight, and me with my melting ice and dashed hopes. Can you HEAR the violins playing?
I can't tell you how many times I fell for tricks like this. As I have said before, it is a wonder my brother and I survived growing up, let alone ended up as friends. To all of you who have fallen into the traps of your wise older siblings, I salute you. Thanks for taking one for the team!
To all of you older siblings, throw us a bone now and then, would ya? I love you Brada-mon!
October 27, 2008
101 Things You Probably Never Wanted to Know About Me...
Jocelyn Dixon (aponderingheart.com) posted 101 facts about herself on her blog, and I liked it so much, I thought I'd use it (I hope you don't mind, Jocelyn). Be prepared for the unusual, along with very candid honesty.
1. I used to hate the spelling of my name, but now I like it.
2. Black is my favourite colour.
3. It irritates the daylights out of me when people say, "You should wear something other than black." I don't tell people who wear a lot of red that they should wear something other than red.
4. I have a very emotional and affectionate cat.
5. I am more like my mother than I thought (not that it's a bad thing!).
6. I hate being late. On time to me is 5 minutes early.
7. I refuse to have a "picture of Jesus" in my house. I don't believe they're ever realistic.
8. I leave my windows open in the winter.
9. I prefer cloudy days over sunshine.
10. I have a 7-foot pine tree in my living room.
11. My blood type is very rare.
12. I like Mountain Dew icees.
13. My brother, dad and mom are my three heroes. All three have overcome tremendous obstacles in their lives and come out as amazing people.
14. There are only three people that truly know who I am.
15. My phone rarely rings unless people want something from me.
16. I lived in multiple foster homes as a child.
17. I have hazel eyes.
18. I like vegetables WAY more than I like sweets.
19. I wear white gold or silver, but NEVER yellow gold.
20. I am attempting to grow my hair out to my butt since I've never done it before.
21. I think it's very weird that I just typed the words "my butt" in a blog.
22. Last Christmas, some dear friends gave me 17-place settings of bavarian china, with serving dishes and all. It made me cry.
23. I cry a lot when I'm alone.
24. I have three tattoos, and would like one or two more.
25. I have accidentally ripped out my nose ring more than once.
26. I LOVE log cabins.
27. Someday, I would like to write a book, but probably never will.
28. I let people intimidate and control me way too much.
29. I name nearly everything.
30. My Trailblazer's name is Julia. My acoustic guitar's name is Beauregard the Second.
31. I play many musical instruments, but I can't read music.
32. I can't stand the words purse, bless or special.
33. Unless I have a child, I am the end of my dad's bloodline.
34. According to "the tests", my personality type makes up less than 2% of the population.
35. I can "see through" people very easily.
36. I absolutely LOVE senior citizens.
37. I don't feel like I have value to anyone.
38. I despise shallow chit chat.
39. I can make up songs, poems and stories on the spot.
40. My brother's IQ is higher than mine.
41. My IQ is 144.
42. Math makes me angry.
43. I have more than 60 pairs of shoes.
44. I love jet black hair.
45 I can whistle and hum at the same time.... sometimes in harmony.
46. I collect watches. I currently have 112.
47. I get very frustrated when I drop my keys.
48. I drop my keys a lot.
49. I buy bottled water.
50. I listen to Christmas music and watch Christmas movies throughout the year.
51. I think faster than almost anyone I know.
52. I react well in emergencies.
53. I analyze everything to death.
54. I am considering going back to vegetarianism.
55. My brother is one of my best friends.
56. My bathroom is currently decorated in Coca-Cola stuff.
57. I like sarcastic humor.
58. I can't look at certain kinds of clowns - they're scary.
59. My favourite number is 10.
60. My least favourite number is 11 - I try hard not to look at it.
61. It bugs me when people pronounce nuclear, "nuke-you-lar", and realtor, "real-a-tor". Minnesotans are notorious for the latter.
62. I wish I could have a garden and grow my own vegetables.
63. It makes me physically ill when I see people suffering.
64. I've coached for two human births.
65. I love my sister-in-law.
66. I love photographing people.
67. I think Carol Burnett is absolutely brilliant.
68. I own a nativity set made up of black bears.
69. I like cartoons. Garfield, Bugs Bunny and Tom & Jerry are my favs.
70. I don't believe in mindless obedience (except in some cases where authority plays a role).
71. I don't allow myself to dream, because I've discovered that dreams rarely come true.
72. I get VERY angry when people pick on other people.
73. My parents got married on April Fool's day. They are divorced.
74. I like living in the city. I don't think I would survive in the country.
75. In the past year, there have been multiple shootings, and two murders in my neighborhood.
76. I have a tendency to road rage.
77. Going to Wal-Mart with my best friend is one of my favourite things to do.
78. I rode a passenger train for the first time two years ago with my mom. It was awesome.
79. My brother and I have hash browns, wheat toast and coffee when we go out to breakfast together.
80. I count in my head, not out loud.
81. I am told I look like my grandmother. I am also told I look like my dad. I am ALSO told I look like my mom. I guess that makes me a mutt.
82. Frequently, when I look into peoples' eyes, they get all wiggly and ask me "What are you seeing?"
83. My cat hogs the bed, and I would rather be uncomfortable than have him move.
84. I rarely make my bed. It's hard to make yourself into a burrito when your covers are all tucked in.
85. I am learning how to stand up for myself. Believe it or not, that's not an easy thing to do when you're short.
86. About eight years ago, someone told me that my looks are the thorn in my side, and that if it weren't for what I look like, I would be famous. That has never left me. I doubt it ever will.
87. I love the smell of cedar.
88. I am very good at tap dancing.
89. I think I have a stupid laugh.
90. I do NOT like doing dishes.
91. I have an amazing stepmother. She's kind, gentle and loving, but I have no doubts that she could kick some serious butt.
92. I am sometimes too independent.
93. I am a true introvert.
94. One of my pet peeves is when someone says they're going to do something and doesn't do it.
95. I like a good musical number.
96. When I see a spider, I get light-headed.
97. I love the way my dad laughs.
98. I have been thrown from a horse many times.
99. I've only been in one fist fight in my life. I had a black-out moment of rage, so I don't remember it, but I walked away unscathed while the other girl ended up with two black eyes and a scar.
100. I can leg press more than 700 pounds.
101. I am me. What you see is what you get.
SWD #4
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/
FOR TODAY (October 27, 2008)...
Outside My Window... it's 36 degrees, and there's a HUGE pile of leaves that blew against the door last night.
I am thinking... about melancholy personalities. If you're a melancholy, it's very difficult to see the bright side of things.
I am thankful for... my health, as I watch people around me start to fall apart.
From the kitchen... I am enjoying a very, very hot cup of coffee in my favourite mug. It keeps things hot for hours and hours, and holds a cold drink with ice for more than 24 hours.
I am wearing... black palazzo pants, hunter green turtleneck, long black jacket/sweater thingy and my awesome Sketcher shoes.
I am creating... a list in my mind of the top sayings that most single people hate to hear.
I am going... to straighten the table in my living room.
I am STILL reading... the same things I was reading the last time I listed what I was reading. *snort*
I am hoping... to remember to savour the autumn days, since they are my favourite.
I am hearing... the ticking clock, the wind whistling wildly outside, my own thoughts racing about on the motorcross track of my mind.
Around the house... I have clothes hanging everywhere because they needed more dry time.
One of my favorite things... is hearing hundreds of people singing together. So powerful.
A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week:
I have no idea right now. Things have to be left open for last minute details on Halloween stuff.
Here is picture thought I am sharing...
I had to share two pictures today. I was driving to work one morning last week and was struck by the beauty of the fall colours. I whipped out my phone and, of course, completely legally, snapped a couple of shots of the road I was on. I thought that, even though they aren't the best quality, they were worth looking at.
Outside My Window... it's 36 degrees, and there's a HUGE pile of leaves that blew against the door last night.
I am thinking... about melancholy personalities. If you're a melancholy, it's very difficult to see the bright side of things.
I am thankful for... my health, as I watch people around me start to fall apart.
From the kitchen... I am enjoying a very, very hot cup of coffee in my favourite mug. It keeps things hot for hours and hours, and holds a cold drink with ice for more than 24 hours.
I am wearing... black palazzo pants, hunter green turtleneck, long black jacket/sweater thingy and my awesome Sketcher shoes.
I am creating... a list in my mind of the top sayings that most single people hate to hear.
I am going... to straighten the table in my living room.
I am STILL reading... the same things I was reading the last time I listed what I was reading. *snort*
I am hoping... to remember to savour the autumn days, since they are my favourite.
I am hearing... the ticking clock, the wind whistling wildly outside, my own thoughts racing about on the motorcross track of my mind.
Around the house... I have clothes hanging everywhere because they needed more dry time.
One of my favorite things... is hearing hundreds of people singing together. So powerful.
A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week:
I have no idea right now. Things have to be left open for last minute details on Halloween stuff.
Here is picture thought I am sharing...
I had to share two pictures today. I was driving to work one morning last week and was struck by the beauty of the fall colours. I whipped out my phone and, of course, completely legally, snapped a couple of shots of the road I was on. I thought that, even though they aren't the best quality, they were worth looking at.
October 24, 2008
TAG
TAG! Read mine, and if you're tagged, do your own and tag someone else!
10 years ago I was :
1- 10 years younger.
2- Working for a computer service and sales company.
3- Still living in the same state as my brother.
4- Playing piano and singing on a church praise team.
5- Sporting jet black hair. I miss that.
5 years ago I was:
1- Working at a Lutheran church. Still am.
2- Enjoying getting to know my best friend.
3- Decorating my house in lighthouses.
4- Teaching the kids at church.
5- Afraid to be who I really was.
5 things on my "to do" list :
1- Not lose my mind.
2- Call my dad.
3- Buy cat litter.
4- Drink some coffee.
5- Try to find people who care about what I have to say. :o)
5 snacks that I enjoy:
1- Frozen peas.
2- Whale crackers.
3- Pretty much any kind of raw vegetable.
4- Raw almonds.
5- A Mountain Dew icee.
5 things I would do if I were a millionaire:
1- Pay off my truck.
2- Buy a log cabin.
3- Kidnap my mom for a tour around the world.
4- Pay off my brother's mansion.
5- Maybe buy a Dr. Pepper.
5 places I have lived:
1- New Mexico.
2- Texas.
3- Colorado.
4- Minnesota.
5- There are no more.
5 jobs I have had:
1- Paper Girl.
2- Bumper Car and Ferris Wheel Operator.
3- Chiropractic Therapist.
4- Office Manager.
5- Paraprofessional.
5 words that describe me:
1- Creative.
2- Outcast.
3- Loyal.
4- Rescuer.
5- Freak.
I tag... well.... the only people that read this blog so far. Jen, Jacque, Amanda and Jocelyn.
10 years ago I was :
1- 10 years younger.
2- Working for a computer service and sales company.
3- Still living in the same state as my brother.
4- Playing piano and singing on a church praise team.
5- Sporting jet black hair. I miss that.
5 years ago I was:
1- Working at a Lutheran church. Still am.
2- Enjoying getting to know my best friend.
3- Decorating my house in lighthouses.
4- Teaching the kids at church.
5- Afraid to be who I really was.
5 things on my "to do" list :
1- Not lose my mind.
2- Call my dad.
3- Buy cat litter.
4- Drink some coffee.
5- Try to find people who care about what I have to say. :o)
5 snacks that I enjoy:
1- Frozen peas.
2- Whale crackers.
3- Pretty much any kind of raw vegetable.
4- Raw almonds.
5- A Mountain Dew icee.
5 things I would do if I were a millionaire:
1- Pay off my truck.
2- Buy a log cabin.
3- Kidnap my mom for a tour around the world.
4- Pay off my brother's mansion.
5- Maybe buy a Dr. Pepper.
5 places I have lived:
1- New Mexico.
2- Texas.
3- Colorado.
4- Minnesota.
5- There are no more.
5 jobs I have had:
1- Paper Girl.
2- Bumper Car and Ferris Wheel Operator.
3- Chiropractic Therapist.
4- Office Manager.
5- Paraprofessional.
5 words that describe me:
1- Creative.
2- Outcast.
3- Loyal.
4- Rescuer.
5- Freak.
I tag... well.... the only people that read this blog so far. Jen, Jacque, Amanda and Jocelyn.
October 23, 2008
Letter to a Dying Person
One year ago today, Mr. Elmer Wetenkamp passed away. I remember the weeks before he died.... helping the family with his care, keeping him fed and clean, sitting by his side trying to calm him as his life was coming to an end. There's never been anything in my life that I've held in the realms of high privilege like this experience.
Day after day, we wondered, "will this be the one?" The last Sunday he was alive, his family gathered around him and wept as they said their good-byes to him. What an honour to be part of that moment, as the realization that the end was coming began to permeate the room. His lovely wife of 65 years, Mary Jane, by his side.... she rarely left his side...... and his children and grandchildren gathered around.
I can recall being up with him in the middle of the last night he was alive. Mary Jane had gone out to use the bathroom and I heard this faint whisper from Elmer's mouth...... "I love you, Mary Jane." Those were the last words he spoke. I've never told her that. I wonder if I should.
Caring for someone in that position is the most incredible, loving thing you could do. The raw vulerability of it all completely takes my breath away when I think about it. Unable to move, unable to speak, unable to bathe or use the bathroom on their own..... wishing they could speak, but surrendering to silence.
I have a new found admiration for hospice workers all over the world. I think perhaps the greatest gift you could give another human is to be the one who sits by their side as their life becomes a misty existence, and eventually fades away.
One day, when Elmer was in his last hours, I felt this overwhelming emotional surge, and this is what came out.....
LETTER TO A DYING PERSON
Dear Friend,
How I wish you could understand the words I write in this letter. How I wish I could talk to you and tell you what I’m thinking.
My friend, you are dying. You are on a journey that no one ever wants to go on, nevertheless, it’s a journey which we must all take. You were talking for a while, and then one day, your words turned to mumbles, and soon after that, your mumbles turned to moans.
I want you to know that as you try desperately within your mind to make your mouth form words, that I am on the other side trying desperately to understand you. As you slowly move your hands and arms to try in some way to signal what you need, I am on the other side watching intensely in an attempt to interpret your movements.
I want you to know that as you decline, and as your body shuts down, I am working diligently to make sure you are comfortable, and not experiencing any pain. I will be as careful as I can when I clean you, making sure the water is warm and you don’t get too chilled as you lay there.
I want you to know that I understand you are very vulnerable right now. I will be as gentle as humanly possible with every area of your body, and when the time comes for you to be cleaned when your body rids itself of waste, I will do everything I can to preserve your dignity.
You are still every bit a person, and you will always be exactly who God made you to be, no matter what condition your body is in. I will always keep that in the front of my mind. I am here. I am watching, listening and guarding to protect you and keep you safe from harm.
It is my honour and privilege to help you, my friend, as I know you would do the same for me. I pray your journey is painless and peaceful. Know that I will be by your side as much as I can until you take your last breath.
All my love and more....
Day after day, we wondered, "will this be the one?" The last Sunday he was alive, his family gathered around him and wept as they said their good-byes to him. What an honour to be part of that moment, as the realization that the end was coming began to permeate the room. His lovely wife of 65 years, Mary Jane, by his side.... she rarely left his side...... and his children and grandchildren gathered around.
I can recall being up with him in the middle of the last night he was alive. Mary Jane had gone out to use the bathroom and I heard this faint whisper from Elmer's mouth...... "I love you, Mary Jane." Those were the last words he spoke. I've never told her that. I wonder if I should.
Caring for someone in that position is the most incredible, loving thing you could do. The raw vulerability of it all completely takes my breath away when I think about it. Unable to move, unable to speak, unable to bathe or use the bathroom on their own..... wishing they could speak, but surrendering to silence.
I have a new found admiration for hospice workers all over the world. I think perhaps the greatest gift you could give another human is to be the one who sits by their side as their life becomes a misty existence, and eventually fades away.
One day, when Elmer was in his last hours, I felt this overwhelming emotional surge, and this is what came out.....
LETTER TO A DYING PERSON
Dear Friend,
How I wish you could understand the words I write in this letter. How I wish I could talk to you and tell you what I’m thinking.
My friend, you are dying. You are on a journey that no one ever wants to go on, nevertheless, it’s a journey which we must all take. You were talking for a while, and then one day, your words turned to mumbles, and soon after that, your mumbles turned to moans.
I want you to know that as you try desperately within your mind to make your mouth form words, that I am on the other side trying desperately to understand you. As you slowly move your hands and arms to try in some way to signal what you need, I am on the other side watching intensely in an attempt to interpret your movements.
I want you to know that as you decline, and as your body shuts down, I am working diligently to make sure you are comfortable, and not experiencing any pain. I will be as careful as I can when I clean you, making sure the water is warm and you don’t get too chilled as you lay there.
I want you to know that I understand you are very vulnerable right now. I will be as gentle as humanly possible with every area of your body, and when the time comes for you to be cleaned when your body rids itself of waste, I will do everything I can to preserve your dignity.
You are still every bit a person, and you will always be exactly who God made you to be, no matter what condition your body is in. I will always keep that in the front of my mind. I am here. I am watching, listening and guarding to protect you and keep you safe from harm.
It is my honour and privilege to help you, my friend, as I know you would do the same for me. I pray your journey is painless and peaceful. Know that I will be by your side as much as I can until you take your last breath.
All my love and more....
October 20, 2008
Orange Pop and Toothbrush Soap
My brother and I are very close, and I love him more than I could ever say. In fact, I am constantly amazed that not only did we survive our childhood, but that we came out of it friends at all. We talk fairly frequently, and maintain pretty much a daily level of contact through emails, instant messaging and phone texting. One of the things I really enjoy about him is that he's a good kind of weird, and somewhat random, like me.
In amongst our texting last year, I received one of these random messages from him that simply said, "I'm sorry about your toothbrush."
My message back, "Uhh..... my toothbrush?"
His reply, "Yeah, when we were kids, I used to rub your toothbrush in the soap all the time, so I'm sorry."
This, of course, launched a great deal of laughter in me, as I have learned to appreciate the humor in all the big brother tricks he played on me when we were young. It's funny, I don't remember my toothbrush tasting soapy, nor did it ever produce an unwelcome amount of suds in my mouth. Does that mean no harm, no foul? I suppose I shall ponder farther.
I have labeled this post, "Orange Pop and Toothbrush Soap". I will use this title repeatedly as I remember different things about growing up. I don't expect to accomplish much out of it, but perhaps, if nothing more, it will create a smile on the faces of the readers.
I love you, Brada-mon!
In amongst our texting last year, I received one of these random messages from him that simply said, "I'm sorry about your toothbrush."
My message back, "Uhh..... my toothbrush?"
His reply, "Yeah, when we were kids, I used to rub your toothbrush in the soap all the time, so I'm sorry."
This, of course, launched a great deal of laughter in me, as I have learned to appreciate the humor in all the big brother tricks he played on me when we were young. It's funny, I don't remember my toothbrush tasting soapy, nor did it ever produce an unwelcome amount of suds in my mouth. Does that mean no harm, no foul? I suppose I shall ponder farther.
I have labeled this post, "Orange Pop and Toothbrush Soap". I will use this title repeatedly as I remember different things about growing up. I don't expect to accomplish much out of it, but perhaps, if nothing more, it will create a smile on the faces of the readers.
I love you, Brada-mon!
SWD #3
http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/
FOR TODAY (October 20, 2008)...
FOR TODAY (October 20, 2008)...
Outside My Window... the world is going by, and multi-coloured leaves are fluttering down.
I am thinking... about Christmas music. I LOVE Christmas music. Especially the old stuff... Bing Crosby, Rosemary Clooney, etc.
I am thankful for... the few family members I have left and sleep.
From the kitchen... a lovely bagel with garden veggie cream cheese and tomatoes.
I am wearing... a burnt red shirt, black pants and awesome chunky Sketcher shoes.
I am creating... a schedule to keep my week straight.
I am going... bonkers.
I am (still) reading... The Confessional, by J. L. Powers.
I am hoping... to go to bed on time tonight. Ha...... haha.... hahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa.
I am hearing... the volunteers recording the attendance and someone's keys jingling in the hallway. Oh... and now the phone is ringing.
Around the house... I haven't been there much lately, so it's almost hard to remember what it looks like. Messy, I think. If Allige would clean, it would help. Gawl.
One of my favorite things... is having long conversations with people. Forget the shallow stuff, I want to dig deep.
A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week: Meeting tonight, meeting tomorrow, practice on Wednesday, girls' night on Thursday, another practice on Friday, another practice on Saturday, another practice on Sunday. So basically, a lot of practice.
Here is picture thought I am sharing..
My stepmother took this picture of her horse, Sniper. I think the picture pretty much says it all, don't you? :o)
October 17, 2008
Old friendships...
I had the chance to meet with a friend yesterday who I haven't seen in more than 14 years. She said the most profound thing about one of her relationships.
She said, "If I want her to accept me for who I am, then I have to accept her for who she is, EVEN if that means that part of who she is means she cannot accept me for who I am."
Yes, yes, yes, you have to read it and analyze it to really see the depth, but when you do, it makes you think.
At one point in our wonderful conversation I said, "I don't want anything, but I want everything, and we can be done with that now." She said I should psycho-analyze that comment. Anyone care to give your professional opinion? :o)
She said, "If I want her to accept me for who I am, then I have to accept her for who she is, EVEN if that means that part of who she is means she cannot accept me for who I am."
Yes, yes, yes, you have to read it and analyze it to really see the depth, but when you do, it makes you think.
At one point in our wonderful conversation I said, "I don't want anything, but I want everything, and we can be done with that now." She said I should psycho-analyze that comment. Anyone care to give your professional opinion? :o)
SWD #2
FOR TODAY (October 17, 2008)...
Outside My Window... Misty drizzle and cool autumn air
I am thinking... that I have a lot on my plate right now.
I am thankful for... the opportunity to visit with a friend I haven't seen in 14 years.
From the kitchen... leftover fried rice. Yum.
I am wearing... a black, long-sleeved shirt and wide leg jeans.
I am creating... a mess, because I have no idea how these blog things work!
I am going... to paint stars on the wall.
I am reading... The Confessional, by J. L. Powers
I am hoping... to be able to remember everything I have to get done over the next few weeks.
I am hearing... the hum of the computer, my fingers typing and someone talking outside.
Around the house... the cat doth lay.
One of my favorite things... is autumn weather and colours.
A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week: Work on the SC room, laundry and sleep!
Here is picture thought I am sharing..
This picture makes me laugh so hard. I can just see how angry poor kitty is about being in the water! I would imagine my kitty would react the same way. I dunno... it just brings me joy.
October 14, 2008
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